r3507 had a party, and most of the Tiny Fools were there. april_tehe showed up, and she was (dramatic chord) a vampire! She bit a whole bunch of people, who didn't resist, but were fairly dismayed at having been bitten. She came up to me once to ask if I'd like to be bitten... I said no.
A small group formed in a corner to discuss the fact that the whole vampire thing was ruining the party, and that somebody should stake April through the heart. They voted that I should do it, so I engaged her in a conversation, and when she let down her guard, I poked her eyes out and looked frantically for something sharp and wooden to jab her with, but apparently vampires can regenerate body parts, and her eyes healed quickly. She was a little offended that I was trying to kill her, so somebody calmed us both down, and I decided that the best thing to do would be to take her outside, and explain that she would either have to stop making vampires out of the other guests, or she'd have to go home.
That was the plan, anyway. The moment we got outside, she started yelling at me: "What the hell is wrong with you? Do you want me to starve? This is a party, dammit! We're supposed to be having fun!" I tried to explain that she was pissing people off, and she decided I had to die. For some reason Kyle's condo was in the middle of an industrial complex, and she chased me around for awhile. I slipped and fell off of a liquid-storage tank and landed on a chain link fence, which sliced me up pretty badly. April came down, dipped a finger in one of my wounds, tasted it, and said, "eeeww, that's gross. Never mind." She went back inside and I woke up.
I'm sure Dr. Freud would have something to say about all this.
Extra points to anyone who recognizes the quote in the subject.