Anyway, I'm discovering that apparently the rest of the world is a little less formal than I am with their messages. This totally understandable and not something I have a problem with because text messages are meant to be terse and to the point -- otherwise you'd send an e-mail or write a note or (God forbid) actually call somebody. Besides, you're typing on that tiny keypad and the word-recognition software built into your phone is only marginally functional and if you're like most Americans you're doing it while you're also balancing an onion bagel and a tall soy latté and your hairdryer while you're parallel parking your SUV...
I don't anticipate parallel parking any SUVs any time soon so I have a bit less to worry about than your average American, but I have been sending a lot of text messages of late. Come to think of it, I'm not sure why I brought up SUVs in the first place. Remind me to get rid of that before I post this. Anyway, I'm beginning to notice a worrisome difference between the sort of messages I send, and the sort I receive. Here is a random sampling of typical examples which I've transcribed verbatim:
Messages I've sent to other people:
- Really? I usually don't like Troma films, but I watch 'em anyway. Never seen Terror Firmer, but I'd like to. Right now I'm watching Doom, which I don't think will be any good.
- Saw you called. Unfortunately, this is the only night I'm free this week and I need to stay home & do chores. Like seriously, they're important. You have a good night, though, and I'll see you on the weekend at least.
- Rockin' like Dokken. Are you talking about the ones on the other side of the house, by chance?
- Oh, what, you need to have your own costume? There's only so much you can do and still be sexy. The whole slutty devil thing is over-used, so my vote is blood-caked catholic schoolgirl with a big knife.
- Okay... Well, given those options and the fact that it's like, midnight thirty, I'd rather just go to bed (if it's all the same to you). G'nite, and I'll see you on the morrow.
- Ok law off the horse aka heroin
- k good might 2 u 2
- im @ bar no need to hury
- Lol ur crazy. Ur a lier
- You are probably busy now if not call me i got done with work early