Then I came home and took my laundry out of the dryer.
I'd put it in there just before I left, you understand. This was, oh, around 6:00, which I guess is irrelevant, but I've already typed it so I'm just going to leave it there. Anyway, I went downstairs to the dryer, opened it up, and discovered most of my bedsheets packed into a pair of jeans.
This has to break some physical law of the universe. Logically the most feasible explanation is that one of my housemates opened the dryer and stuffed the sheets in there, but ribsinbacon left before I even started my laundry and RJ is still at work. The only possible explanation -- which I consider less likely than my roommates going considerably out of their way to sabotage my laundry -- is that my sheets managed to migrate into the left leg of one pair of jeans while the jeans were tumbling, before they'd managed to dry, despite the fact that they were buttoned with the zipper up. And we're not talking part of one sheet, oh no. We're talking about a pillowcase, the entire fitted sheet, and most of the top sheet. Nothing else got caught in my jeans -- no socks or shirts or other pairs of jeans -- just my sheets.
So now my sheets are soggy and I'd rather just throw them back in the dryer and crash than fix the problem. They're not the only set of sheets I've got, but they're the only set not buried under stuff in the basement, and drying them will take longer than I feel like waiting. I'll put them on the bed tomorrow. In the meantime, well, I've got a sleeping bag.