December 17th, 2004

Wedding day

The first step is admitting that you have a problem.

Secret Santa at work concluded today. I hope the guy I was buying gifts for doesn't feel patronized by his Hipper Hop Buddy with Realistic Beat Boxx Jamz™. Altogether I received:
One (1) M&Ms Mini Dispenser that looks like one o' them M&Ms guys. His eyes move when candy is dispensed.

One (1) set Mini Mad Wheelz. I've never heard of this toy either. Remember Micro Machines? These are basically the same concept, except that one is shaped like an order of fries on wheels, and the other is a nose with mucus trailing behind it. I would've killed for these when I was like, six. Seriously. I would have.

One (1) set magnetic photo holders. Note to self: it is not funny to leave the pictures of other people's kids in them and refer to them as "my accidents."

One (1) ball-point pen with a red LED and a candy cane inside. This thing must hold about as much ink as it takes my doctor to write a prescription, but when you press the point down, the light illuminates the candy cane. There's a small plastic Christmas tree on top, and it unscrews so that the candy cane can be removed.

One (1) Currier and Ives coffee warmer with mug and a packet of coffee.
Is it that bad? Do I drink that much coffee? Do I even need anyone to answer that? I was going to ask if Currier and Ives made good coffee, but it occurred to me that I'd heard that name before and couldn't place it. I Googled it, and guess what? Currier and Ives sells art prints. For this reason, I'm a little worried about the coffee. We've all seen "gourmet" gift sets where the wheat crackers were made from compressed egg cartons* and the cheese turned out to be American with little bits of chocolate in it.

Speaking of American cheese, did I tell anybody my recent grocery shopping experience? Probably not. I was in line at the grocery store, and the woman in front of me was telling her friend how American cheese is the best example of "our great country's ingenuity." Why? Because the slices come individually wrapped. Because the texture is so smooth and creamy. Because when you buy American cheese, you can be assured of always getting a product with the same physical qualities, not like other cheeses that sometimes "get too sharp." When got to the front of the line, the checker simply said, "I don't eat this stuff." The woman gave a disdainful "hmmpf." I chuckled, and the woman called me a communist.

Actually, that very last part may not have happened, but the rest is true.

Wow, let's see. American cheese, coffee, Secret Santa... I'm hopping all over the map now. What else? Well, last night I didn't do anything productive at all. I recorded a reading of H.P. Lovecraft's The Festival which I was going to set to music, but recording and editing the reading took a good chunk of the evening, and I eventually ended up deciding that I'd rather have the late Richard Burton do it. Maybe I'll pick up a new microphone soon and try again. Maybe not. I did get some music written though, so the night was not a total waste.

Wednesday night wasn't a waste either. Ellen and I got together, she cooked dinner, and we watched The Ninth Gate which is one of my favorite films. Either she liked it or she was patronizing me. Anyway having seen the movie for the first time in several months, I now have a burning desire to pick up a copy of the book it's based on. I'm about to take my lunchbreak and I think I'll look over at Half Price Books, but they're not going to have it.

* I actually like those crackers.
  • Current Music
    Wilco -- Don't Fear the Reaper