December 9th, 2003

Wedding day

People are dumber than I thought

Sweet mother of all that we as humans hold sacred.

So when I arrived to work this morning, I received a rather innocuous little memo. Nothing big. Nothing worrisome. Just a company-wide e-mail explaining a system issue has been discovered and is being fixed. They wanted to alert us before somebody found it on their own and started freaking out. No big deal, right? Wrong.

A couple of minutes later, somebody sent out a question relating to the problem. We use Lotus Notes for our e-mail here at work, and it comes with two basic reply options: Reply (which sends your message back to original sender), and Reply to All (which sends your message back to the sender and all the addressees of the original message). A lot of people don't seem to grasp the difference between the two Reply functions. Guess which one this guy chose?

Usually when somebody makes this mistake, it's not a big deal. It usually happens within the building I work in, which means that oh, say, 300 people receive the message. Either it gets ignored, or a "sorry -- I'm a dumbass!" message comes through ten minutes later. And that's it. End of story. Not today though. Today the legitimate message went out companywide to approximately 4,500 employees. The accidental one went out to every one of us, too. So did the reply. Then the "this is personal information that you probably don't want to share" message. Then the "I don't understand why I'm getting these messages" message. Then the response to that one, and the response to that one... And so on. Finally someone in HR sent out something asking us not to discuss this topic via e-mail anymore, and be sure to know the difference between Reply and Reply to All.

Fat chance of that happening.
  • Current Music
    Igor Stravinsky -- The Rite of Spring
Wedding day

I coulda been a contender.

Two points:

1. Coming down with a head cold is not fun.

2. Being forced to relive painful memories is never a good thing.

Actually, the memories in question are not painful. But they will not be discussed. Ever. Except with the one person who brought the subject up, and I swear: if you so much as breathe a single syllable of what we eventually discuss, I will turn you (or parts of you, anyway) into haggis.

So what is this sordid and unspeakable subject? It's the fact that I could, a few years ago, have been a minor celebrity. If I'd given up all my moral scruples in mid-2000, I might have managed Hollywood success along the lines of post-public indecency Paul Rubens. Hell, I did manage to make about $1,500 in two-cent increments over the course of four days. Legally, and without anybody taking their clothes off, I might add. If that's not proof that somebody wanted to buy that crap, I don't know what is.

But I'm a different person than I was in 2000, and I'd rather not think about the whole business anymore.

Besides, that song was awful.
  • Current Music
    Not that song.