November 19th, 2003

Wedding day

Welcome to the post containing the word "crotchpheasant."

So I'd had a pretty good day. Nothing big going on, but pretty good. I worked. I got stuff done. I went to Janesville to hang out with Tom. It was fun. Then I went home and got the bad news.

First Warren Zevon, now Michael Kamen.

You know Michael Kamen. Even if you don't think you know him, you do. He did the orchestral arrangements for Pink Floyd's The Wall and the soundtracks to X-Men, Hudson Hawk, and The Adventures of Barron Munchausen. He arranged and conducted for the orchestra on Metallica's S&M, vastly improving The Call of Cthulhu (sorry, I can't bring myself to spell it wrong) and bringing his own flair to Ennio Morricone's already ultraglorious The Ecstasy of Gold.

Anyway, now I'm all depressed. And if John Linnell spontaneously combusts before the next time They Might Be Giants play in Madison, you'll pay dearly. Yes, you. Personally. I know where you live, crotchpheasant.

Um, anyway, tonight I'm writing a small utility program in response to an argument -- sorry, discussion -- here. Ehh, it needed to be done anyway. In fact, I might just go back to editing all my HTML in DOS (not likely, though). Come to think of it, what happened to all those games I said I was going to write?* Here's a list, in no particular order, of programming projects which will likely never be presentable:

Working title: Purpose: Approximate start date: Current status  /  last worked
Why I haven't touched it for ages:
Captain Spleen 3D Third installment in critically ignored series of Captain Spleen games. June, 1997. Currently being developed into radio drama.  /  May, 2000. Captain Spleen has already killed Mr. Pointy and his cousin, whatever that guy's name was (Nasal something?).
The Q-Files Game about aliens running out of gas in Roswell, 1947. July, 1996. Currently being blocked out of memory.  /  Also currently being blocked out of memory. It's a dumb idea.
The Adventures of Rhubarb Bunnywing Game in which dead chicken-plucker  is resurrected to do battle with vegetables.  I'm serious. October, 1998. On hold.  /  Not that long ago. Need to develop the plot without plagiarizing The Face in the Frost by John Bellairs.
_Ball Game to waste time at work. Sometime in early 2002. Finished, unreleased.  /  Sometime in early 2002. No longer have time to waste at work.
Crawl II Another game to waste time at work. August, 2003. Map generator is finished.  /  August, 2003. Honestly, who needs another text-mode RPG?
MOLE Commissioned by Russian Underwear Software.  Game about spies, underwear, and Tony Nder. September, 1999. On hold.  /  April, 2003. Came to realization that I only started work on it so I could forget the whole Sarabeth's Parents Debacle.
Anvil Creek Murder mystery game in which residents of a small, New England town are being turned into chocolate. April, 2003. On hold.  /  April, 2003. No idea.  It's a good story. 
Swashbuckler Game about a pirate who drives a monster truck on the high seas. Let's call it June, 2002. On hold.  /  December, 2003. Because it's a game about a pirate who drives a monster truck on the high seas.
P.A.N.T.I.E.S. MS-DOS user interface design system. March, 2002. Finished, unreleased.  /  March, 2002. I use it to automate tasks sometimes, but it's basically CICS for DOS.  Who needs that?
CDOS DOS command line replacement. Early 1999. Deleted in hard drive crash before I was smart enough to back things like this up. Meh.  Improved design with Lintilla.
Homicide Game in which you, a high school student, must avoid being killed by your best friend Bill, a serial killer on homecoming court. Late 1997. Deleted in different hard drive crash before I was smart enough to back things like this up. This game was really good.  Really good. 
I will never be able to get over its loss, or create anything even marginally as entertaining.  Sorry.
Rock Collaboration with Evil Jim in which you play a rock.  Earn points for acting like a rock.  Lose them by doing unrocklike things, such as running for President or eating dots in a maze. Late 2001. Not started yet.  /  Early 2002. This game is really just a justification for writing several smaller games.  Haven't gathered up the ambition to start it yet.
Lintilla Extensive command line replacement with scripting language and about a million, billion utilities. November, 2002. In progress.  /  Like, last night, dude. Because it's gonna take a long friggin' time to get it to where I want it.
XenoN GUI frontend for Lintilla. July, 2003. Only have graphic routines done.  /  July, 2003. Who cares?

Geez, that's depressing -- I never finish anything. Oh, and if you steal any of my ideas, I'll give you headcrabs.

* This is exactly what happened to all the games I was going to write: I reviewed my Mole/Rhubarb Bunnywing engine and decided I needed to do the games in Windows. I don't want to do the games in Windows. I don't want to do anything in Windows. I'll give up and join the real world someday.
  • Current Music
    Steve Vai -- The Reaper