Colin Timothy Gagnon (sacredspud) wrote,
Colin Timothy Gagnon
sacredspud

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Quick, dirty, dumb.

Dumb All Over.


...sincerest apologies to your ears, but mostly to the late Frank Zappa.


Whoever you are, wherever you're from
You've probl'y noticed by now that your behavior is dumb.
And if our chances expect to improve,
it's gonna take a lot more than trying to remove
another race or another whatever
from the face of the planet altogether.

Now we call it the Earth which is a dumb kind of name
but they named it right 'cause we behave the same;
we are dumb all over.

Dumb all over? Yes we are.
Dumb all over? Near and far.
Dumb all over? Black and white,
people, we are not wrapped tight.

Wimps on the left, sharks on the right,
and the President's cronies on the air every night
twisting the facts to tell a story
and making all the details sound real gory
about what we should to the folks over there
who don't agree with the stuff we do over here.

You can't run a race without no feet,
and pretty soon there won't be no street
for dummies to jog on or doggies to dog on--
the Republican party can make it be all gone.
It won't blow up or even disappear,
it'll just look ugly for the next four years.

They've badgered their support out of fear and religion
dredging up every heap, every lump every smidgeon
of panic and pain, alarm and hate
and spun it all up to make us all feel great
while our troops fold, spindle and mutilate
innocent civilians in a terrorist state.

TO ARMS! TO ARMS!
Hooray! That's great.
Two legs ain't bad (unless there's a crate they ship the parts to mama in for souvenirs. Two ears? Get Down.).
Not his, not hers, but what the hey!
The Right Wing says it has to be that way!
It's like a modern version of the Crusades!
With whips 'n chains and hand grenades...
TWO ARMS? TWO ARMS?
Have another and another.
Pieces of your friends, and maybe of your brother.
While that other guy says "Help is on the way,"
The President tells us the only the way
to free their people is to "Burn 'n destroy...
and repent, and redeem and revenge, and deploy
and rumble thee forth to the land of the unbelieving scum on
the other side cause they don't go for what's on our agenda
and that makes 'em BAD.
So verily we must choppeth them up,
and stompeth them down.
Or pick up one o' those nice WMDs
to poof them out of existence
while leaving their real estate just where we need it:
To use again for drilling valuable oil
'cause we can really take care of business!"

And when his humble TV servant
with nice humble hair, and humble white skin
and a nice humble suit takes our phone calls on the air
and tells us it's okay to do this stuff,
then we gotta do it, 'cause if we don't do it,
we're not good Americans!

Depending of course on which side you happen agree with.
It had better not be the left --
it's all lies! You forgot Poland!
Isn't that right? Isn't that what they say?
Every night? Every day?
Hey, we can't really be dumb if we're just following the government's orders!
Let's get serious for a moment.
The President knows what he's doing.
After all, we elected him and the law says
that the President's gotta be a man of the people
So if he's dumb, then we're dumb...
and maybe even a little ugly on the side.
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